Desert Drag

About Desert Drag

Can anyone emulate the Red Devils this year? Let’s look into our crystal ball and find out!

Arsenal vs. Benfica (Agg 1-1) (5.55pm GMT kick-off)

Last week’s first leg between these two sides was a frustrating one for both teams. Benfica will feel disappointed not to have taken advantage of Arsenal’s wasteful nature in front of goal, while The Gunners will be kicking themselves not to have sealed the tie at the first time of asking.

About Desert Drag

Carrot Top is nothing like Gallagher. His props aren’t watermelons meant to be smashed with a sledgehammer. They’re topical jokes complete with setups, tags, reversals, and callbacks. They are gadgets engineered with the punk-rock aesthetic of early Saturday Night Live.

And many are filthy—much too explicit to detail here. Children are barred from the showroom for good reason.

The first audience eruption during our visit came from a pair of Paris Hilton night-vision goggles. When he looked through them, everything turned grainy green as he struck the stiff, awkward posture recognizable from her leaked sex tape. No explanation. No setup. Just the goggles and the pose. The joke was perfectly timed to the cultural moment—the exact kind of gag Letterman would have killed for.

About Desert Drag

A lottery player in Pennsylvania, specifically in South Park Township, may have every reason to check their recent lottery tickets, as one of them is bound to be the winner of a $3-million prize.

Bought at the 7-Eleven on Brownsville Road, the ticket for The Hunt for $3,000,000 game has already fetched the store a $10,000 bonus for selling the top prize. However, no person has stepped forward to claim the prize itself.

There have been no further details about the lottery prize. The Pennsylvania Lottery only finds out that a winning ticket has been sold after the fact, but the lottery cannot tell whether the person buying the ticket actually realized that they had won.